Learning to Fly

So what happens when you write a movie about Burt Lancaster during his years as a trapeze flyer? You damn well better learn to fly. The last few months I've set out to do just that. After a few painful attempts in my backyard I realized that I needed professional help. That's when I met Richie Gaona. Richie is a stunt man, circus coordinator, and general bad ass. He's been my coach now for a few months and I'm actually showing some promise. Thankfully, I don't have to try and sum up for you what a typical trapeze class looks like as the L.A. Daily New just did a piece that you can view online. Click on the title of this post to link to it. As you can see it's wild. For those of you that think us flyers are crazy, well, you're right but we're having a better time than most. Besides being a a blast, flying has gotten me one step closer to understanding the man I am going to play in the movie. To do what he did in his films and under the big top takes a little dose of crazy, a ton of courage, and more desire than Bono sings about in that great song. Burt had it all. Every time I fly, I feel a little bit closer to him. It could just be the adrenaline getting the best of me but I'm pretty sure it's the spirit of Lancaster egging me on. After all, he knows how hard it is for a 6'3 guy to learn a sport that is designed for 5'5 gymnasts. I can almost hear him laughing every time I hit my feet on the bar. Keep laughing my friend, keep laughing.

The Art of Rejection

As an actor, I consider myself to be a master at handling rejection. I get rejected all the time. But it doesn't ever get any easier to hear that short, loaded word, NO. It always stings, always. Any of you harbouring dreams of carving out a life in the entertainment biz, know that NO is going to be a familiar sound. In case you haven't figured it out yet, I just got my first NO regarding my script. Here the deal in a nutshell. I got the script to another actor for a role that they were perfect for. The actor liked the script and liked me but, alas, NO was still the answer as the actor had too many other commitments. Understandable of course, but a bummer still. In fact, this was my first NO for the script. If the burn of getting told NO as an actor is like putting your hand on a electric burner, the burn of getting told NO as a writer is like sitting right on that burner and turning on the one next to it. Now don't get wrong, I didn't expect every Dick and Jane in Hollywood to love my project, but I really wanted this Jane to dig it. So, I was a little disappointed yesterday. But, then something fun happened. I did one of my kids shows yesterday at a school somewhere in East LA. The show I perform is about John "The Pathfinder" Freemont, California's original bad-ass. I perform for kids in grades K-5 and they think it's just about the coolest thing ever. As I recounted Freemont's grit and determination as he crossed the country several times on foot, I began to buy into my own performance. By the time the show culminated in me telling the kids to "Work hard and follow their dreams," I had convinced myself right along with those 5o cheering kids. The NO from earlier in the day faded away as I realized how good I have it. I've never had to eat some of my friends to stay alive like Freemont did so who am I to complain? Before long, that NO was long gone and I rejected my rejection. So, what's the point of all this? People always say NO. Sometimes they have good reasons, but sometimes they just can't be bothered. In this town, you get used to it, accept it, and learn to move on to the next person who just might say yes. And even if the next person says no, and the next, and the next, you have to keep saying YES. Say YES and believe it. It's contagious, especially when your audience is full of 7 year olds.

Where is everybody? Oh yeah, France.

For those of us left behind while most of the entertainment world heads off to Cannes, these few weeks in May are painfully slow. Not only is there no work to be had, but you get e-mails from friends telling you all about how much fun they're having drinking French wine, hobnobbing with stars, and streaking at the premiere of Indiana Jones (yup, that's a friend of mine). But, I'm proud to report that, this year, I have something at stake in Cannes. While I am sitting on my couch in Los Angeles, my script, Lancaster, is actually being pitched there. All right! But wait, why am I still on my couch? Here's the scoop. I have an actress attached to the script. She's talented, beautiful, perfect for the role, and very much committed to the project. All of which I am eternally grateful for. This actress decided to have one of her assistants join her in Cannes and bring lots of copies of my script. I have visions of them taking big meetings and talking all about the amazing project they are sitting on. They're going to come back and we're going to do a deal! On the other hand, they don't have Yellow Pages in France and maybe she needs to change a light bulb. Four or five of my scripts would probably give her just enough lift... Not to get off topic here but is everyone out there aware of how out of control the assistant phenomenon is here in Los Angeles? Don't get me wrong, someone like the actress I have attached certainly needs help to stay on top of her demanding schedule. But, trust me, not everyone who has an assistant really needs one. It's become a status thing. People here like to say, "I'll have my assistant call you and set something up" just before they get into their Hyundai. I think that there should be some ground rules for getting an assistant if you work in the entertainment field. Here are my criteria: 1) You should have an office and the hallway in your 1 bedroom apartment doesn't count. 2) The job description for the assistant should have more than "do my laundry" and "go find me a pint of Ben & Jerry's." Seriously, that's just lazy. 3) No assistants until you can pay for business lunches. This has happened to me! A friend gets off the phone with his assistant and then says, "Can you get this? I'm a little strapped." Then fire your assistant and pay for lunch! 4) No hiring an assistant for the sole purpose of doubling the number of friends you have. 5) No hiring of your boyfriend/girlfriend. That's cruel. 6) You must be willing to send your assistant to Cannes with my script. OK, that last one is a bit selfish. But, there's another week of Cannes left so let's all keep our fingers crossed for big news on Lancaster. Until then, I'll be the on the couch drinking wine from Trader Joe's and watching my naked friend get carted off by French police while Harrison Ford shakes his head. Someday, I'll get to streak in France... maybe I'll have my assistant do it for me.

My First Blog...

The best part of being a first time blogger is that you know nobody is paying any attention. It sure takes the pressure off of me to write something profound. But, why not give it a shot? As I once said on Wheel of Fortune when I was trying to win money for my theatre company, "Go big or go home." Sadly, I hit bankrupt and the play was financed with dirty money. Let's hope I have better luck with my blog. So, why the hell am I blogging anyway? Well folks, here's the deal. I am an actor and, once in a while, I've been known to produce a film now and again. Mostly shorts, but I actually pulled off one feature, Westender. It's not bad. Gene Wilder sums it up best in Young Frankenstein, "Nice, nice... not thrilling, but nice." Anyway, I've decided to have another go at a feature and this time around I'll be starring as well. Oh yeah, and I wrote the script. So, for anyone who wants to follow the highs and lows of an independent film maker, you've come to the right blog. I promise to bare my soul during the process in the same way I bared my ass in the film "Refrigerators." By the way, if you can find a copy of that one and you didn't work on the movie, I'll buy you lunch. My feature is called Lancaster. The first few drafts were titled First of May Men but I eventually settled on Lancaster because people kept saying, "What's a maymen? Is that like a mermaid?" Besides, my movie is about Burt Lancaster and he's way more famous than me so I thought I should exploit that fact to the fullest. I like the simplicity of Lancaster anyway. It's clean. As it turns out, the script's not half bad. At the very least, it's good enough to be darn close to getting made. And so, I'm going to share the process with you. Enjoy the ride, and be sure to chalk up your hands.